Four-Prong Settings are the Devil

Why the Most Popular Engagement Ring Setting is a Bad Investment

If you’re the kind of person who wants to lose or break her diamond, then a four-prong setting is perfect for you.

Let me just paint you a picture… you’re out in the backyard, playing with your kids. You’re pushing your daughter on the swing set, and in your exuberance, you smack your hand on one of the side bars. Your diamond comes loose and falls out of your ring. In a panic, you dig around in the dirt until, luckily, you find your diamond hiding under a piece of mulch. But you smacked your hand so hard that your diamond got chipped, and you need to put a claim into insurance to buy another diamond.

Who needs that stress and aggravation!?

Four-prong settings are notorious for getting snagged on clothing while you are getting dressed in the morning or putting on your coat to leave the house. And if even one of your prongs gets bent or comes loose, you are at extreme risk for losing and having to replace your diamond.

On top of that gut-churning risk, if your bend or break one of your prongs, you’ll have to pay to have your setting fixed or replaced. Depending on your level of activity, you may need to pay for that repair yearly or even every three-months if you are extremely active.

Since in many cases the center diamond is up to 2/3rds the cost of your ring, I want your investment to be protected!

Now, let me play this straight with you… the four-prong setting is a variation on the six-prong Tiffany-setting that was invented by Charles Lewis Tiffany in 1886. And who can argue with Charles Lewis Tiffany? If you are the kind of woman who absolutely loves prongs settings and absolutely has to have a prong setting, get six prongs! The six-prong version is much safer and more stable.

However, I’m an adventurous, bold woman who likes to talk with her hands, work with her hands, and get into the nitty-gritty to get her hands dirty. If you are active like me and you want your stone to be protected against chips, breaks, and getting lost, I highly recommend a bezel-set diamond for you.

The bezel setting is by far the safest setting for any diamond because the entire edge of the stone is protected by metal.

Let me paint you a picture… you’re out in the backyard, playing with your kids. You’re pushing your daughter on the swing set, and in your exuberance, you smack your hand on one of the side bars. The side of your bezel gets dinged a bit, but your ring is otherwise undamaged. When you have the time, you take your ring to a jeweler to be professionally polished, and when your ring makes its way back onto your hand, it looks better than new as if nothing had ever happened.

*Sigh* Doesn’t that sense of security feel nice? That’s the feeling that a bezel setting can give you.

 

Okay, now that I’ve given you my opinion, I’d like to give you some additional tips and tricks to help you make your engagement ring purchase (and hopefully save you some money in the long run):
-I’ve put together a Engagement Ring Settings Visual Guide to help you see and understand the strengths and weaknesses of each setting type. Hopefully, this guide will help you see what you like/don’t like and help you make the all-important decision on which setting to buy to protect your diamond.
-AND if you are looking to get engaged soon but you don’t yet know your fiancé’s ring size, I have Three Tips to Covertly Get Her Ring Size. Simply follow the link, and download the guide.

Thanks for reading, and happy ring hunting!

Don’t Get Hoodwinked

How to Spend Responsibly on your Engagement Ring

In 2015, the average amount couples spent on an engagement ring was between $4000-6000. And in a article recently published on The Bustle, the pinnacle on Engagement ring spending in 2016 is at an all-time high, the average cost peaking at $5,978.

If you’re spending that much on a ring, wouldn’t you like to know that you’re getting your money’s worth? Considering that one of the leading causes for divorce is financial strain, I should say so.

So, let’s break it down and give you some helpful tips to guide your Engagement Ring purchase.

Supreme tip #1: Do you have a budget? Have you given some thought to what you’re comfortable spending? You MUST give this some thought before you go shopping. Over-spending is not the goal here, purchasing a token of your love and commitment at a price your comfortable with is.

Keep in mind that the actual sweet-spot for spending on an engagement ring and not putting strain on your relationship seems to be between $500-$2000 dollars. If you’re comfortable spending more, that’s up to you. (And it’s okay to split the cost of the ring with your sweetheart! Just have an open, loving conversation about it!)

Supreme tip #2: In most cases, up to 2/3rds the price of the ring is your investment in the diamond, so let’s get you in the know about diamonds.

Do you know about the 4C’s? Color, Cut, Clarity, and Carat Weight? If you don’t, go do some Googling. There are about a ba-gillion articles out there about the 4C’s that explain what each means. I don’t go into them in depth here because I don’t want to waste your time on defining jargon. Instead, I want to teach you some tips about how to THINK about the 4C’s and how to choose the right diamond for you and your soon-to-be-fiancé.

In my mind, two of the “C’s” are more important that the others: Color and Cut.

Color is graded on an alphabetical scale from D-Z. “D” being the best, “Z” being the worst. Unless I’m working with a couple that has very specific budgetary constraints, I won’t even consider a diamond graded less than a G-H in color because stones with lesser ratings start to look “dingy.” You can sacrifice slightly on Clarity, getting a diamond with mid-range clarity, and as long as it has a bright, white color, your diamond will still look quite brilliant.

“Cut” doesn’t just refer to the shape of the diamond (although it is important to know which shape diamond your fiancé would prefer), “Cut” refers to how well the diamond is faceted and how well the diamond manages the light that is being refracted through it.

“Cut” is graded as “Ideal, Excellent, Very Good, Good, and Fair.” If your diamond is cut poorly it won’t matter what Clarity rating it has, your diamond will have no fire or sparkle because the light is either being refracted out of the stone too soon or getting “stuck” inside the stone. As long as your budget allows, I would not purchase a diamond with a less than “Excellent” Cut rating, but some “Very Good” stones still have plenty of sparkle.

Now, to be fair, if your fiancé wants a larger stone (a stone with a heftier Carat Weight), you may need to compromise on the other 3C’s because diamonds are mainly priced by their weight.

So, take the time to figure out which of the 4C’s might be most important to you and your fiancé, and adjust your budget and expectations accordingly. You don’t need a stone with excellent ratings in all 4 categories as long you know which ones to prioritize.

Supreme tip #3: Even though the ring is all about the diamond, your proposal isn’t really about the diamond at all. So, put some thought into the design of the ring!

If your fiancé is a classic, simple person who just wants a beautiful diamond in a classic solitaire setting (again, do some Googling), that is perfectly fine.

BUT, the design in the ring is where the meaning comes in! Do you and your fiancé have any inside jokes that can be turned into a design element? What flowers does she love? What are her hobbies? Where was your first date? Where were you when you realized that she was your person and you fell madly, deeply in love with her? What’s your love story?

Having the answers to these questions can yield all kinds of interesting design ideas that can be incorporated into a ring and give it that one-of-a-kind, special, you’re-the-only-one-for-me feeling.

So, give these questions some thought because, in all honesty, you can spend a little less on the diamond, incorporate these special design elements, and give her an absolutely show-stopping ring.

 

Okay, now that you are armed with a bit of education, don’t be afraid to go out there and browse.

BUT, if you want some more information, I have a couple additional resources for you:
-If you want a slightly more in depth look at the 4C’s, I’ve put together a 4C’s Visual Guide to give you some more tips. Simply follow the link and download the guide.
-AND if you are thinking about proposing soon but don’t yet know your fiancé’s ring size, I have Three Tips to Covertly Get Her Ring Size. Again, just follow the link.

Good Luck with your Ring Hunting!

Fake Diamonds and Gender Politics

So, in my adventures through the interwebs last week, I stumbled upon this article on Refinery 29…

This article, The Infuriating Reason a lot of Women Wear Fake Engagement Rings at Work, spoke about the really sad (and creepy) fact that many women in the service, retail, and hotel industries wear fake engagement rings to avoid being hit on by older and/or predatory men.

To be perfectly honest, I had never heard of this phenomenon. But this trend has become so big that jewelry giants like Kay and Jared actually carry lines of fake rings.

As a designer whose whole credo is about creating rings that celebrate the love between two people and the life that they want to share with each other, I am so saddened by this trend… and the fact that women feel the need to wear engagement rings as some sort of armor rather than as a celebration.

From one Woman Warrior to another Woman Warrior, if you are one of these women who wear a fake ring to feel safe, I’m sorry that you need to go through that to feel at home in your own life. But I’m glad that you are protecting yourself.

Here’s hoping that one day the world will be different.

*  *  *

If you want to join the dialogue, here’s the facebook post that started the whole discussion and inspired the article on Refinery 29.

No one is coming to save us…

But we, as Modern Woman Warriors know… we’re allowed to ask for help.

If you’re like me, a child of the 80’s, then you understand. Growing up, we were bombarded with the idea that our Prince Charming would save us… that no matter what financial or intellectual or spiritual hardship came our way, someone sweet and kind (and well-off) would magically appear, usually followed by a train of magical animals. Thanks Disney.

But life is rarely that simple… or linear. Right?

We’re older and wiser now. We know that even if we find our Prince Charming, he could decide to leave. Even if we find our dream jobs (because we got tired of waiting for Prince Charming, duh. Tongue in cheek there, just in case you missed it), we could get downsized. People get sick, children get hurt, we don’t always get what we’re promised.

“The best laid plans of mice and men…” and women.

But the upside to all this hardship is that while it does in fact turn some of us into heartless recluses, it brings some of us together into brilliant, supporting communities.

The most important promises that we’ll ever keep are the ones we make to ourselves.

So what does all this have to do with jewelry and diamond rings? Practically nothing, except that I’m speaking to my Women. I’m speaking to the women who understand.

We’re fighters. We aren’t afraid to admit when we’re wrong. We aren’t afraid to ask for help. We go after our dreams. We don’t take no shit off of anybody.

But we also get tired because there’s so much to do and it never stops… especially if you’re a mom or an entrepreneur or any woman trying to make a difference in her own sphere of influence…

So, my small gift to you, in acknowledgement of your challenges and in gratitude that you find the strength to keep going is this modest list of my favorite resources to help you decompress, relax, take care of yourself…

Indulgent Bath Products:
Lush Bath Bombs
Medicinal Grade Essential Oils that Are Less Than 1/2 the Price of Doterra

To Help You Reconnect with Yourself:
You Are a Badass by Jen Sincero
E-squared by Pam Grout
Dandelion, the Extraordinary Life of Misfit by Sheelagh Mawe

To Help You Feed Your Body and Your Soul:
Recipes
More Recipes
Some of the Best Free Guided Meditations I’ve Found on the Web
Metta Meditation, the most powerful one there is

To Help You Feel Beautiful:
(otherwise known as a shameless plug for my friend who takes a teaching approach
to skin care and make-up application)
Pink Cadillac Mary Kay Consultant, Regina Russo

Don’t Sass Me

She’s a goddess covered in motor oil and grease,

but don’t let her “boy’s club” appearance fool you; she’s every ounce a woman. She’s got the grace and determination of a river racing to meet the ocean; the same type of inevitability in her actions and words. She’s a mother. She’s a wife. She’s an entrepreneur. She’s a business woman who gets more done before breakfast than most women get done all week.

Don’t mess with this woman unless you want the business end of a positive attitude.

Custom ring from 14 karat white gold and oval sapphires repuposed from a client’s bracelet.

Phoenix Diamonds

No, these diamonds aren’t from Phoenix, Arizona. In this case, I’m talking about diamonds that got a second life in a new ring design.

My client, Debbie, came to me with a set of wedding rings and a bracelet and asked me what I could make for her. And boy, did I make her something fabulous!

We had a wonderful conversation about what she wanted her new ring to mean and symbolize… and as it turns out, she literally wanted her new ring to symbolize a rebirth for her.

Her wedding rings had come from a previous marriage in which her Ex had treated her in a less than honorable fashion, and she found herself without any kind of support. She literally kept her wedding rings as an insurance policy in case she found herself in some financial hot water.

But the day came when through her own industry she was back on her feet and successful again, and she wanted to transform the rings as a reminder of her triumph.

So, from that great conversation, this beautiful, stunner of a ring was born: custom designed and custom made from white gold and my client’s re-purposed diamonds.

Thanks for letting me transform your sparklies, Debbie! You truly are a Wonder Woman.

First Ring… Ever

Friends, this is literally the first ring that I ever made… like ever.

Way back in the day (2006), when I was just starting my career as a student at Edinboro University, I made this ring to satisfy the requirements of our “sweat soldering” project.

I won’t bore you with the technical details, but I still have this ring in my collection and I still wear it to this day… because let’s face it: this ring is sexy!

Made of sterling silver: pierced, file carved, fabricated, sweat soldered.